So, my weekend started out boring. Friday, I didn't do anything. Barely got off the couch. Fell asleep there around 9:30. At least I was able to wake up early on Saturday. For Saturday, I had 2 options. One was to go to Carowinds with Greg and Sherron - but thunderstorms were threatening all day so I decided not to go on the possibility of paying $45+ to ride a few rides and getting stuck in the rain without a poncho. The other option (which I was planning for) was to volunteer for Habitat for Humanity. But, when I pulled up the website for directions, they posted that they weren't taking individual volunteers this week. So... I sat on the couch the rest of the day.
Later that evening, I joined Jared for a charity bowling event. His friend Jerome put on a charity event for Big Brothers Big Sisters at the AMF bowling center, and it was a blast. Good times, good people, fun event. My only critique of the event was that there wasn't any "little bros" or "little sis's" there to partake. That would have given the event a little bit more purpose. Without the kids, it was pretty much an event to drive donations toward the organization - which is still admirable in itself. After the bowling, I joined Jared and his friends at Thomas Street Tavern to hang out afterwards. And to make a long story short, I was a party pooper and I headed home before anyone else. Jared decided to crash on his buddy's couch, so I called a cab to take me home sweet home.
Sunday morning, I awoke at my usual time of 7:00. Got up, made some breakfast, and laid on the couch for a while. My arm was sore from bowling for the first time in a few years. My throat was sore from screeming over the loud music all night to chat. My body was dragging from staying up later than I usually do, and probably from having 2 more drinks than I'm used to. [2's my usual limit. ;) ]
So there I was sitting on the couch again - watching Sports Center. The Masters was on, the first week of baseball season had started, and the NBA playoffs were nearing. I was just content to take an easy morning to recover from a late night. But, something inside me said... Get UP!
Get up. It was Palm Sunday. The Sunday before Easter. And I knew I belonged in church that morning. So, I got up, got ready, and was sitting in the pew well before the start of the service. It had been a tough week for me. A lot of emotional issues all seemed to come to a head. Worry for my loved ones was gripping me. Pains from the past was still hurting me. And, the outlook for my future seemed uncertain. Something made me get up that morning and go to church. I'm not sure exactly what it was, but I'd like to think it was the result of someone else's prayer. Or, the belief that in church I would be able to put all this baggage away and hear of something better.
Our chuch service starts the same every week. There is a welcome, followed by praise and worship (singing), prayer and offering, then the sermon. I must admit, up until the sermon, I was dragging. I was sitting there thinking "why didn't I just stay in bed?" I could have watched a sermon on TV. And this was tough for me, because the songs in this church are usually my favorite part.
But, then the pastor began his sermon. As he began, he broke from his script and said this... "Let me start by saying, that there is someone here today that didn't want to be here. You were sitting on the couch this morning thinking you could just stay home today. But, something brought you here this morning and you don't know why. The Lord wants you here today. The Lord has something in store for you today, and I want you to listen to my message because it is for you."
I was shocked. It was me. I really felt God speak to me just then. My heart rate soared.
Now, I've been to several sermons where the preacher would say something similar to this. They would say that someone was there who had a drinking problem, or someone was there who needed to be relieved from sin and debt, or something of the sort. But, there was no mistaking this for me. Regardless if it was a vague description for anyone dragging their butt to church that morning or not - what the pastor said was exactly what I was doing and thinking just 40 minutes prior to that moment.
The sermon was about God's amazing forgiveness. It was about not letting your past cripple your life. It was about not allowing Satan the opportunity to mess with your mind. There is no way that I can recap this sermon to describe how perfect this message was for me right now. My only wish was that my loved ones could have been there with me, listening to the same sermon, taking that message to heart as I did, and that I can express my joy fully to explain how deeply I was touched.
My church posts video of each sermon on the internet. They have 2 services each Sunday morning, one at 8:00 and the other at 10:30. I attend the 10:30. They tape and post the 8:00 service to the internet. I feel this is a little bit backward, because in all honesty I can tell that the pastor holds back a little in the 8:00 service so that he can have enough emotion reserved for the 10:30 crowd. As an attendee of the 10:30 service, I can truly say that he lays it all on the line and never disappoints. That being said, the links below will have the same message, but not necessarily the exact service that I attended.
Part 1 - He talks about the story of "Saving Private Ryan". He paints the picture of a spiritual war. And reminds you that no matter how bad it gets, you don't need to worry. Because, as Hebrews 12 reads..."In your struggle against sin, you have not yet resisted to the point of shedding your blood." How bad can it be? Jesus stood in front of your sin, and took the bullet. He paid your debt. He's the one who bled. Not you.
Part 2 - He talks about a friend of his who he visited in a mental hospital. How your strength can wear down.
Part 3 - Talks of Satan's methods of planting seeds of doubt and worry. But, begins with God's promise - spoken clearly in Psalm 103:10-18.
Part 4 - Where God is when you fall.
Part 5 - Prayer and closing.
A friend recently confided in me that they don't know how to pray anymore. They feel so far away from God right now that they don't even know how to approach a conversation with Him. Unfortunately, I think many people can relate with this type of feeling. But, the amazing thing about God is that His forgiveness is free. His forgiveness does not come with a price tag. In Psalm 103, it says that "He does not treat us as our sins deserve, or repay us according to our iniquities...the mercy of the LORD is from everlasting to everlasting upon them that fear him, and his righteousness unto children's children."
Sure, we've all sinned. We all have acted in ways that are shameful to recall. But, the cool thing is that God's love for you will always be. Forgiveness is free. It may sound too easy, and almost too good of a deal.
I don't know about you, but I'll take it. I'll take the forgiveness and choose to live in the present. I will let the Lord carry me through each day, and be thankful for the mercy he's granted me for my past.
I thank the Lord for those who are praying for me. I am so glad that I got off the couch and went to church. And I sincerely hope that someday my prayers for you will return the same joy and hope as your prayers have done for me.
I made a trip to Walmart today to pick up some necessities and some office supplies. As I was strolling through the aisles searching for office supplies, this booklet caught my eye. Right there with the day planners, graph paper, and accounting forms was a packet called "Get a Divorce - Do It Yourself".
Wow! How far have we fallen? Apparently, for anonymoty, you can also order this online from their website. This blows my mind.
(sorry for the blurry photos. i apparently wasn't holding my camera phone still)
